So first, you've got to have credentials. Here are mine, for the big tent and the Pepsi center. They are special. Don't lose them or you will have to beg your political contacts for more or trade for more or really just kind of hang out somewhere else at any number of parties.
You have lost your credentials. You must go to a party in a brick building, and there is grey carpet and people have pins on and are wearing suits and nametags. You meet a lobbyist and ask her why she is at the convention, and she says 'I'm a lobbyist, duh.' You move on and forget about her. You are hungry, so you forage for food. Here's some bad fruit you can eat. Or not!
Here's something that looks like sushi from afar. I think it has cheese in it.
And of course there are brownies and cookies and strawberries. Somehow they look awful, but all they are is butter and sugar and chocolate. That's convention magic. It's like a reverse Midas touch.
You are done (not) eating, and feel kind of sick. That was good day old fruit and cookies and also vegan sliders from some other weird party that the Kentucky delegation was making fun of and blaming cosmopolitan culture for.
And here's the crowd at the party. It's very trade show-esque.
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