I had an interesting discussion with someone in which it was wondered why Sonia Sotomayor wasn't questioned/rumored to be a lesbian as much as now. Divorced in 1983 and engaged one other time, "uppity" woman, active with women's groups, distinctly masculine voice... you know the drill. She replied that perhaps it was because Sotomayor was married and that put an end to the speculation.
Of course, marriage has always been an institution that gay, lesbian and bisexual individuals have used, for better or worse, to put an end to harrassment/rumors from family and community members. In fact, I think Charlie Crist did it just so he could get on the shortlist for VP in 2008. I even know several gay friends of mine who were married- some with kids- and came out of the closet later in life.
Which is why I don't expect pieces like this to put an end to the speculation:
Elena Kagan is not a lesbian, one of her best friends told POLITICO Tuesday night, responding to persistent rumors and innuendo about the Supreme Court nominee's personal life.
"I've known her for most of her adult life and I know she's straight," said Sarah Walzer, Kagan's roommate in law school and a close friend since then. "She dated men when we were in law school, we talked about men - who in our class was cute, who she would like to date, all of those things. She definitely dated when she was in D.C. after law school, when she was in Chicago - and she just didn't find the right person."
Walzer, half amused and half appalled to be discussing her friend's sexual orientation, agreed to be interviewed after Kagan's supporters decided they should tactfully put an end to the rumor, which White House officials had already tried to squelch in background interviews with reporters. She said she decided to talk to POLITICO because the discussion of Kagan's personal life has become a "distraction."
"It's taking away from substantive discussion of the issues from a really substantive person who deserves to be given the opportunity to address the substantive issues," she said.
Another friend, former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer, a member of Kagan's social circle at Princeton University, wanted to make the same point as Walzer. "I did not go out with her, but other guys did," he said in an email Tuesday night. "I don't think it is my place to say more."
The reason is because in this culture, I've found that not being married at Kagan's age or, as Kagan's best friend put it, "didn't find the right person" is, to many, the same as being a lesbian. What's one of the most common things parents tell their kids when they come out of the closet? You guessed it- "Maybe you just haven't found the right guy/girl yet."
So while I'm hearing a lot of "well, that's that" from a lot of my peers as if it will put an end to the speculation, I doubt it will at all. The reason I think that is two fold. First, imagine if Lindsey Graham's or Charlie Crist's close friend came out and said the same thing. More people would chuckle and shake their head than believe it. Second, in the eyes of many, women of Kagan's stature, looks, romantic situation, etc. will always be suspicious. Culture, and people's personal feelings derived from it, simply trump news reports and sources when it comes to this kind of thing.
Also from the Pennsylvania Progressive Summit (paprogressivesummit.com), I'd like to bring you a few videos form a panel simply entitled 'Marriage Equality'. On this panel, the speakers discussed the benefits, issues, and consequences or allowing homosexual couples marriage rights equal to those of heterosexual ones. The panelists and approached the topic from a variety of angles. Some spoke about the legal issues equality, both in the PA state legislature and in the constitution, others talked about the religious aspects, especially from the Christian and Jewish traditions, and others talked about the moral and human rights aspect of the debate.
The clips below go into many of the arguments against marriage equality and gay marriage and why most of them struggle for validity. The first video, PA state senator Daylin Leach, who sponsored a bill in the PA state legislature in support on marriage equality, goes into many of the arguments against gay marriage that he has heard while debating the bill. As he says, no one has debated him twice, because no one has presented him an argument with any validity. The second video looks at many of the religious issues brought up by the marriage equality debate. Many think that religion has no part of the legal debate over gay marriage and often when religion is invoked, it is done so incorrectly. Finally, the last clip discusses why marriage equality supporters should want legalized gay marriage and not civil unions. Civil unions seem like an acceptable compromise, but really they are impractical and still discriminatory.
She is an eloquent speaker, an expressive author. Elizabeth Edwards is effervescent, effusive, and has an excellent mind. She understands profound policy issues as easily as she prepares a sandwich. Her memoir appeared on The New York Times bestseller list. Few think of Elizabeth Edwards as every woman. Other daughters of Eve might say Edwards is exceptional; surely, she is not as I am. Yet, life experiences might have taught Elizabeth Edwards otherwise. Just as other ladies, she is brilliant, beautiful, and not nearly equal to a man.
I recently got married to a wonderful woman. But in spite of her long list of great attributes, she has a fatal flaw: she is non-partisan.
She works as a live-in nanny, so we have had a good mix of "together time" and "apart time". But over the past month or so, she and I have spent every evening together. And that is great... except that she wants all of my time. And not only does she want me to focus less time on progressive politics and more time on her, she has also recently complained about the money that I donate to MoveOn, Democracy For America, and other groups.
During the end of the 2008 campaign, I thought it was cute when she jokingly said "You love Obama more than you love me". Now I am starting to think that she really feels that I should have to choose between her and political activism. She is a recent immigrant, and she does not know (or care) much about American politics.
She does agree that the starving should be fed and the homeless should be sheltered. And after I got her to watch "Sicko!", she agreed that America should have universal health care. But her natural inclination is to think that politics is something that happens to other people, and that she and I should focus on our individual lives.
As my wife and I begin to operate more as a couple and less as a pair of individuals, it is possible that she will become the second progressive activist in our household. Or perhaps I will end up shifting more of my time and money to personal concerns and away from political activism. Does anyone here have any suggestions for how I can get her to share my enthusiasm for progressive politics?
Women's Voices Women's Vote has some fascinating new research out on the marriage gap and single women in the electorate. Of people "under the age of 30, Barack Obama rolled up a 60 to 30 percent lead among white unmarried young women, but only managed a 45-46 percent split among white married women under 30."
Single women also go for progressives when voting on the Congressional ballot, and went for Kerry by 23 points in 2004. This is a large and stable progressive voting block.
On June 20th, the First Presidency (the president and counselors) of the LDS (Mormon) church issued a letter to California's LDS church leadership that asks the Mormons in the state to do "all they can" and donate their "means and time" to promoting passage of a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage.
The Mormon leadership intended the letter be read from the pulpit to Mormon congregations across the state on June 29th. They were no doubt dismayed by news that, within a day of issuing the letter, it had already found its way to WikiLeaks and has now been widely promulgated (e.g., here and here).
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